Sunday, March 18, 2018

(no subject) (3/17/08)


[1]So my new companion is another white nerdy Utah boy with glasses who worked at Wal-Mart[2] so it makes the Church seem less diverse than when I was with Elder Ch., a Hawaiian Californian Renaissance Man. It will definitely be a different experience with Elder Co. He looks like Chicken Little. He is kind of what happens if you cross me and Elder Ch. as far as various interests go.

I'm officially no longer a greenie but the wards don't tend to think so and they don't really trust me.[3] Oh, well. It's not my permanent ward.

Sorry I didn't send a paper letter this week. There wasn't anything else I really needed to say and I didn't have time. I might try to write you a little less so I can catch up on writing back the other people who've written me.

So our new district consists of Elder Melville and Elder Co.; Elder C. J., district leader, and his greenie, Elder D. (I listed them in our phone as My Two Sons,[4] and whenever I see it the <i>My Three Sons</i> theme pops into my head, so I might have to change that); Elder Cly. and Elder B., the latter of whom is sort of notorious for being an apostate;[5] Elder G. and Elder Cla., zone leaders; and Sister Sha. and Sister Shi., the latter of whom had an anxiety attack during district meeting.

Yesterday Duane, our investigator, showed up at church and participated in classes. They are so completely golden. There is a scary possibility with them with a funny story behind it. When he was on the wrong track Duane stole a computer from Wal-Mart then fell asleep in the car in the parking lot. He also tried to load thirty lawnmowers on a truck and steal the truck. He was caught with both crimes but they were going to let the lawnmower charge go since he was going to jail for the computer. Now, four years later, the lawnmowers have come back so he has a court hearing in a few weeks. We hope they'll let him off.

Speaking of jail, our drunk investigator (who was sober when we saw him this week) might go to jail because he was charged with indecent exposure and then failed to go to court. He wants to go to jail so he can quit smoking and drinking but he worries without medication he'll die in jail. I've never met someone who wanted to go to jail before.

Well, the Welshes[6] are going to take us to Costco and Elder Co. is waiting for me even though I have a while left on the computer. If I think of anything else important I'll write you a snail mail.

Happy St. Patrick's Day and Easter. The 22nd or the 23rd (I can't remember which) is the earliest Easter can be so this is an unusual year.[7] My tie isn't terribly green but no one wants to pinch missionaries, as far as I know....[8]

--Elder Melville


[1] I don’t know whether I forgot to give the email a subject, or if I consciously typed “(no subject).”
[2] I worked in the Walmart deli from June to October 2007.
[3] I’m so quiet that people thought I was green even in my last area.
[4] Both their names ended in “son” (I edited the names out for the internet).
[5] “Apostate” in mission lingo means disobedient. This elder toned it down by the time I met him.
[6] The couple we lived with.
[7] Easter was on March 23, 2008, the earliest I can remember.
[8] I had asked my family to send me a tie that was unquestionably green, so what did they do? They sent me a tie and said, “I’m not sure this is green enough for you.” Exactly what I wanted them not to do. They said they wanted it to match the suit. :/

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