My first weeks at college

This is a reminiscent account, rather than one where I try to remember every detail.

January has me reflecting on my very first days of college six years ago in 2010. I was living at Stratford Court 303, just south of campus.

Every day of the week, I had my 8:00 calculus class. Fortunately, I was fresh off the mish and trying to maintain a missionary schedule, so 8:00 wasn't too early for me. On MWF I had music 101 later in the morning, so I would stay on campus between math and music. However, once music was over, I would walk home for lunch. I find I'm always hungrier during the winter, so I'd be pretty hungry by the time I made it to my apartment. I would usually heat up a can of soup on the stove, or sometimes I'd have peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with bland grape jelly. I would read my scriptures (I was reading the Old Testament that year) and I would spend some time on Facebook. I think I allotted myself 30 minutes to Facebook every day. (Strangely, I think I'm on Facebook more now, yet I waste less time on it.)

Then I would walk back up to campus for my Book of Mormon class and my late-afternoon "American History through Literature" class. Those first couple of weeks I only knew the buildings in relation to the Wilk, so I would walk up to the Wilk, then over to the JSB--even though there was a much more direct way to the JSB from my apartment.

On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I had my introductory English language class, which I had asked the professor if I could add because I hadn't initially enrolled in it. I was going to take an English class, but I narrowly averted becoming an English major. (Whew!) I think I would stay on campus until that class, since it was early afternoon, and then I would go home for the day.

(In later terms and semesters, I would stay on campus until all my classes were done for the day, and I would pack lunches.)

During the evenings, I had a dinner group I would attend. Of course, all I had to talk about was my mission. I was very awkward, and I cringe to look back and think of how I must have seemed to those who had been at college for a lot longer. There were two others who had just returned, but they might have had some college before their missions, I don't remember. I'm pretty sure I was the worst adjusted one there. But it was very good for me to go, because it helped me adjust into post-mission life and gave me social interaction.

I was an extremely dedicated student at that time, and I would plan exactly when I was going to do my homework in my leftover missionary planner and subsequent "RM Daily Planner," and I would stick to it. I didn't have time for social engagements outside of dinner group, church, and FHE. Which was probably good, because that might have been the most rigorous semester I had, due to having an Honors course and calculus. My first Friday, there was a ward dance, but I left just as people were getting there, because I had to go home to be in bed by 10:30. I was pretty uncomfortable at the dance anyway.

I kind of wish I'd been more social, looking back, but I was already more social than I'd ever been before.

Certainly sitting at home on a Friday night, in my late 20s, writing a boring blog post isn't much better!

Post-mission awkwardness

This post is more introspective rather than anecdotal. Six years ago at this time, I had just returned from my mission, and I was incredibly awkward. I got progressively better, but I think my awkwardness lasted about two years.

Let's face it, I'm still awkward. But I'm talking about the awkwardness where I think back and cringe.

I was awkward in high school. Then I did my mission. And then I knew that since I had returned, I didn't want to be the same person I was before my mission. So I had three different persons coming together--my old awkward person, my missionary persona, and the person I wanted to be. The results weren't always pretty.

One of the first things I did was join Facebook, which I hadn't done before. I didn't even do the MySpace thing. I cringe at a lot of the things I wrote. Particularly comments on other people's stuff. For example, when someone talked about snow plows, I used it as an opportunity to explain all about how in Washington and Idaho they don't plow the roads very well and it just packs down. No one cares, buddy. When someone asked how my mission was, I had to go in depth on all five of my areas and how great it was. My Christmas-day status is typical of how I always had a mission story to tell:

Ah, to think that last year at this time I was snowed in at a member's house in the middle of a wheatfield just outside of Edwall, WA! Merry Christmas everyone!

Then just four weeks after I got home, I started at BYU. I had never done college before, so this was a new adjustment for me. It wasn't as much an adjustment as I might have expected, since I had already experienced being on my own and living with other people. But I remember my first FHE in Provo, explaining how I had just got home. Someone decided to have us go around and say a guilty pleasure (like silly websites or something). Mine was listening to Cherie Call. Honestly I don't think I had any guilty pleasures at that time. (Today I would probably say listening to Lady Gaga.) Then we played two truths and a lie. Of course, I had to use "I lost sixty pounds on my mission." It would have been better if I said "I once weighed 250 pounds." Someone else said they had built lots of Lego Star Wars sets, and one girl was quite confident that I was the one who put that--even though I wasn't. Then we had an activity where we were supposed to say something like a great challenge or a great accomplishment we did--I had to say my mission.

One of my first weeks there, our ward did a dance party. I spent most of the party standing against the wall, even when I was painfully conspicuous. Then I had to leave early because I had to be in bed by 10:30 (on a Friday night). In all my classes, I was always making comments about things on my mission.

I was trying to find a job in Provo, but the job market was really tough in 2010. As a last resort, I applied at the MTC, since nothing else had worked out. I prepared a lesson for my interview, and then I went. It was an awful experience. I could tell that the interviewers could tell I knew what missionaries were supposed to do but I wasn't a great teacher. I didn't have a teacher personality. I went back to my apartment just feeling embarrassed about it. My roommate was in the apartment and could tell I wasn't happy; he might have asked me about the interview. I told him how awful it went, and in my frustration I blurted out "because I'm just an awkward person." He said, "Now Mark, you know that's not true," and I responded, "And you know it is true." He responded, "Everyone's awkward when they get home from their mission." I thought to myself that I was more awkward than most. Which was probably true.

My roommates the Jeffs were great roommates to help me adjust. They didn't judge me. My room roommate, James, may have been the worst roommate I ever had, but the Jeffs, and later Alex, were wonderful.

I could go on, but I just wanted to get some of these thoughts down.

However, in fairness, this was probably a little too harsh on my post-mission self, because, like Jeff said, everyone's awkward when they get home. I also made some great decisions and overcame my former awkwardness in many ways. It was during this awkward time that I took up running, which started simply as a means of exercise but has morphed into an activity that brings me great satisfaction. I tried to dress better. I wasn't successful, but I tried. I also began to listen to popular music, having previously subscribed to the old-person theory that old music is inherently better than new music. (It's not.) And that first semester, I was more diligent in my studies than I was in any other semester of college (and probably high school, for that matter). I took some tough classes, and I don't think I could have handled it if I didn't have the work ethic I had then.

I've moved on with my life now, but I still think about my mission. Why, just last night I had a dream that my mission had been extended, and my extension was ending, and on one of my last nights I was visiting a tiny town that was mostly Italians. One of my recurring dreams is tracting without a companion or without proper proselyting clothing. (My other recurring dream is about Lady Gaga at church.)

And although I was awkward after I got back, I think a mission was the best thing I ever did. If I hadn't--well, I just tried to imagine it, and it wouldn't have been pretty.

October 25

As I continue to remember days surrounding Halloween, I get further and further from the day itself. This time I'm remembering what I can about October 25.

2014. In the evening I went to stake conference at our stake center; my friend Emily texted me and asked me if I could save her a seat for her because she was running late. One of the stake presidency made some comment about being old (I don't remember what it was), and then another of the presidency later made allusion to the comment, so I had to explain to Emily what was going on because she had missed that part. After the meeting I went to the overflow to help put up chairs; I saw Crystal and David Hawks talking to each other. I had never met David, so I introduced myself and told him we were home teaching companions. This might have been the night when I watched It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown at home and Allie said, "It's trick or treat, not tricks and treats." I journalized as follows:
"This morning I went running. It seemed unusually hard. This afternoon, I picked an apple from our own tree and threw another dead rat away. Then we went to Winegar's, and I made dinner. I went to stake conference, and Emily sat by me. Then I got gas and washed my windows, and then we watched It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown."

2013. Hmm...I think that Friday night I watched It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, and my roommate Scott came in toward the end, and I think he was mildly disappointed he had missed it.

2012. I looked at my class notes, so this might have been the time our geomorphology professor, Jani Radebaugh, told us about climbing a mountain in Africa to see a lava lake. She said that most lava lakes were hard to access; this one was hard and it was one of the more accessible ones. She showed us the fascinating footage she took and said they could feel the heat every time the lava churned. That night I was watching the sixth-season Halloween episode of Bewitched, and my roommates Bryton and Cameron joined me. Cameron and I sat on the couch facing the TV, while Bryton reclined on the love seat that was sideways. He said, "I'm sorry I'm taking up the whole couch," and Cameron said, "It's OK--fatty." We laughed, and Cameron said, "Sorry, I grew up with brothers," and Bryton said he only grew up with sisters. After the show, Bryton said he liked that episode less than some of the others we had watched, because it seemed like a UNICEF commercial, and Cameron agreed. Cameron said, "Wasn't her husband in the military?" I said no; then I realized he was thinking of I Dream of Jeannie, where Tony was an astronaut. Bryton said Bewitched was a better premise than Jeannie because they were married, rather than her being a "wench" in the house.

2010. I went to my first working day at my new job at the Distribution Center. We all sat at the tables that were in the break area just off of the work area. Most of the other workers had gone home, so they put us to work filling garment orders on station 6. Maybe it was station 5, I can't remember.

2009. After Sunday School, a less-active member we were teaching told us that he wasn't married to his girlfriend. They had a three-year-old kid together, so I assumed they were, as they were a very close family. That night, we went to our bishop's house because we wanted to tell him, but he told us--the man had told him as well. I think we had a discussion about beliefs sometimes getting misconstrued. For example, he had a Protestant preacher who lived next door, and he was sure that he believed in doing good things and living good lives, but the "faith vs. works" things sometimes got in the way. I said sometimes the same thing happened with the view of the Trinity. This is my journal entry: "Today was a fairly routine Sunday. Shaun texted us to tell us he couldn't make it, but Michael and Nash and Barbie came. We had to teach Gospel Essentials, and we learned that [name] and [name] are not married.
"Elder Tamblyn did a good job speaking in the branch. Then we had dinner with the Dukes, and visited the Palmers. Elder Tamblyn wasn't feeling well again so we came home."

2008. We tracted a little street in Ritzville and a lady had her door open. She invited us in and talked to us forever; I think we finally left without discussing anything with her because she talked the whole time. I think we borrowed some members' bike pumps to fill up the tires for our investigator's kids. We left Ritzville and went to Davenport, where we tracted again. An elderly couple let us talk to them, and they were folding their white laundry (including whity-tighties) in the living room. They invited us back. Then we went to the Mondovi grange, which was a ways out. They had hay bales and other fall decorations, and they had paper on the tables with crayons on them, so we could draw on the tablecloth. We sat with some members, and we were supposed to draw something on the tables about something from our past or childhood. The member drew some incident about a bear when she was a baby. I wanted to draw my broken bones, so the only thing I could think to do was to draw my skeleton with broken bones. The member guessed, "You're a skeleton? Or you were a skeleton." They had a talent show. The first part was playing "The Monster Mash" and having the branch president's son walk around in a costume; the member we were sitting with "sang" along with the spoken lyric "Boris sent you." They had the bishopric doing some poem or song from Hee-Haw while their wives were dressed up in costumes. One of the lyrics was "the way she's built" and Sister Kieffer was stuffed with padding in her overalls. Elder Love was laughing his head off. We took pictures with a pitchfork and the hay bales. Then we drove out into the countryside, down a little ravine where there was an unexpected neighborhood. We were looking for a potential investigator we found in our area book, but it was dark and we were too nervous in the dark to knock on these rural doors. Then we went back to our "residence" with the Herron couple. I wrote a long journal entry detailing the weird dream I had had:
"Last night I left my glasses on, planning to get up again, but I unexpectedly fell asleep with them on. At 3:00 I woke up hot, with my glasses on, loud trains going, and somewhat confused.
"Then I had a very interesting, detailed dreams with a bunch of storylines. We were looking for a package Dad supposedly sent Mom--I don't know why he wouldn't have given it to her. We traipsed around Ritzville to find it, but Dad later said he hadn't sent it. I couldn't believe he went along looking for it, knowing he hadn't sent it.
"With Elder Love we were listening to my Hymns, and one had an electric guitar. It seemed a little edgy for church music, and sounded like a country or rock song.
"I had a spider made of a pom-pom and pipe cleaners and paper eyes that scared Allie. So I took it and gave it wiggle eyes and a paper smile and planned to increase the amount of legs from six to eight. But then I found I had more than eight legs, and soon I was making an old brown fridge into a spider. I put the head on the top and was gluing the legs on the side. There was a magnet for a bank, and a representative from the bank decided to capitalize on the spider. She was talking about members, as in members of the bank (not of the the church, as I was thinking), and talking about how they knew their members. To illustrate, she said the spider's legs were members of its body, and she could tell stories of each leg. I found that many of the legs had faces, but I just accepted it and went on. I had to object when she said two legs were husband and wife when I knew them to be brother and sister.
"Then I found a Christmas ornament that was a green ice skating mouse, as well as a little candy cane mouse. Then I was pulling garlands and things out of a bin while the TV played Christmas episodes.
"And we went to see some members who had a cement room with a blue wooden stand thing. When we saw them they had a crazy white animal jumping all around the room, but the room was actually meant for displaying polar bears in the clothes the members made for them.
"But in the much more important real life, we tried to see some people. One lady let us in and just chatted while she made potato salad. Funny how some people can do that. We filled up the tires on Michelle Jensen's kids' bike. Then we left Ritzville.
"Driving through Harrington I suggested seeing Michael Heit, a less-active building a plane in his garage. He also has his own radio station--100.5, I believe.
"We got to Ritzville [I meant Davenport] and tracted into people that I think will be a bash session concerning the deity of Christ. He said he will have someone over with him.
"Then we went to the branch harvest festival, out in Mondovi, a small place. It was at a grange hall. They had dinner and a few silly activities. We got to see the stars in their brilliance before we came home and made calls."
Man, that was my favorite area. I miss it.

2006. I believe this was the day Woods Cross had the trunk or treat. On my way home from school, I stopped at Kmart to buy some candy to take; I found some chocolates that had M&Ms embedded in them. I went home, listening to the Corpse Bride soundtrack, to change into my vampire costume. Then I went back to the school and met up with the other Spanish Club people in the lunchroom; they had a bowl for the candy. Then we went out to the front parking lot for the trunk or treat. I talked a lot with Mrs. Jamison, who had been my French teacher. Many people admired my costume; someone said I couldn't be wearing the pendant I was wearing, since it was an X. A girl--Analia?--was saying how cold it was, and I was thinking it wasn't that cold, but then I remembered I was in a suit. There were some of the less virtuous girls wearing scanty costumes; an overweight one was wearing a short-skirted nurse costume, and we were sure they were cold.

April 17-21, 2014

Time to remember last year's Easter!

Thursday, April 17. In the morning I went up to the JFSB for the French Language Fair. I went into the foreign language lounge area, and one of the French professors assigned me and two others to be in charge of Le gare, the "railroad station." We set up a table and set up some maps and signs next to it. I talked to my "coworkers"; one was a master's student in English who had studied a lot of French, while the other girl was in a lower level than I was. We sat at the table and all the kids would come up and try to talk to us in French; we were to pretend they were buying tickets, and I somewhat felt it was a little silly to write a price on a piece of paper. I would ask them "aller simple ou aller retour," and many of them would repeat, "aller recour." I would ask "fumeur ou non-fumeur," and when they didn't understand, I would imitate smoking. Some of them said fumeur, not realizing what they were saying; but one student deliberately said it, so I said, "C'est mauvais pour la sainté!" I had never heard the pronunciation of the city Reims, but the master's student helping out pronounced it, and later one of the teachers did as well. Upon finding out that one student wasn't from a high school, the master's student said, "Quel collège?" The kid thought "collège" meant college, so she had to say in English, "What middle school?" Eventually, one Drew Bringhurst came by. He recognized me as being from the same ward, but he didn't immediately say so. I asked if Mrs. Jamison still taught French, but he said she didn't, and I thought he said it was Mrs. Gregg. Eventually, it was time to clean up. I was walking around in my red-orange pants, Eddie Munster shirt, and blue Converse. I didn't have any of the French pastries they were offering us, since they weren't Eastery. I wanted to see if I could find the WXHS French teacher, so I walked around, but didn't find anyone, but some of the kids remembered me from my booth. I even walked around outside to try to find someone from Woods Cross. Then I went to my apartment to work. Later, Mom called me to meet them at the Old Spaghetti Factory, so I drove up there. In the restaurant, they talked about how Mom had forgotten her credit cards, so Susanne had to pay for everything. After dinner, I got in my car, but it didn't start, so I called Mom and asked them to return. They did, and then they came over to my car--and then it started just fine. I drove back to my apartment, listening to my new Mamas and the Papas CD, and the song "String Man" came on. Then I met my friend Megan and we walked up to the Eyring Science Center so I could show her the stream table. I even brought with me a tiny piece of the plastic sand that I had accidentally taken home on a previous occasion. On our way there, I told her about participating in the French Language Fair, and she said her sister did that once. While we were looking at the table, one of my Geology 210 comrades, Hannah Checketts, looked in the room. Then we went down to Spoon It Up, and I had a bowl of cereal while she had frozen yogurt, and we talked about me only eating seasonal things, so I could have Easter M&Ms. Then she said that her friend Natausha had texted her. I went back to my apartment and watched The Easter Bunny Is Comin' to Town; my roommate Jordan was in the kitchen with this then-girlfriend Laura, and they seemed slightly amused by the show; Jordan half-heartedly sang along with the song "If You Do," and Laura went "aww" when it was over. This is a portion of my journal entry for the day:
"Today I helped out at the French Language Fair. It was funner than I expected, just saying, 'Bonjour, où est-ce que vous voudriez aller? Fumeur ou non-fumeur? Première classe ou deuxième classe? Aller simple ou aller retour?' I saw Drew Bringhurst from the 11th Ward, and he said the teacher was no longer Mrs. Jamison--maybe Mrs. Gregg?
"I worked, and then Mom, Nan, and Allie took me to the Old Spaghetti Factory. My car didn't want to start, but then it did."

Friday, April 18. We went up to our final for French 322. We got the prompts we could write about, and I chose one on gun control, since I had written a blog post about that. I cited examples of the Florida theater/popcorn incident and the Sandy Hook and Aurora tragedies. I expressed disdain that Obama's neutral plan was so widely opposed. During the final, Mme Petelo's son came in. Then I went to my apartment and prepared to go home. I got my remaining Easter stuff and drove home, and on my way home I saw a billboard for Ken Garff with chocolate bunnies, and I was excited that I would be getting some (but I didn't). When I got home, I showed Mom my Easter treats. I was going to share my carrot cake M&Ms, but she thought they were jelly beans and said "I don't want that." She wanted one of the egg-shaped Reese's ice cream bars instead.

Saturday, April 19. We probably had our egg hunt that morning, but I can't quite remember. I went to Famous Footwear and got some red Sperry shoes, and I think the cashier liked my Peeps shirt. That evening we colored eggs, and I couldn't resist drawing shamrocks on one and dyeing it green. My family was surprised I would do that, but shamrocks aren't exclusively for St. Patrick's Day. My family showed me the nutcracker M&M dispensers they bought in Vegas and let me choose one, so I chose the orange one, and I put the carrot cake M&Ms in it. Susanne had some, but Matt didn't want any. That night, sister missionaries came to our house to share a lesson. We talked about how I was finishing up at BYU, and one of the sisters had been there before her mission. They asked Allie about what we celebrate at Easter, and she was very shy in responding. At one point, my dad said that I had never done anything wrong.

Sunday, April 20. After church, I wrote on my blog. We went to my grandparents' house for dinner (my grandpa really liked my blog), and I was pleased with the basket they had full of candy. I was excited to eat it, and Peter was a bit surprised, but it was Easter candy so I could. (I couldn't, however, have dessert.) I was wearing orange striped socks, and he asked if they were Easter socks or just regular socks. Then I went home and wrote on my memory blog. I got an email with a special prize for helping out at the French Language Fair, but the prize was the text of Handel's Messiah so we could look at it while listening to the MoTab's Messiah concert, which I thought was a pretty lousy prize. But while writing my blog, I did listen to the concert to see if it was better than the MoTab recording I have from the 90s. The 2014 performance wasn't really that great, because the soloists were terrible and operatic. I wouldn't say they were an improvement over the earlier counter tenors.

Monday, April 21. I worked on the couch when there was a knock at the door. It was a guy my parents hired to redo our basement walls and ceiling, and he had come much earlier than anticipated. I let him in, and he began taking down the ceiling. He opened the door to let the dust out because he didn't know how to open our downstairs windows. I showed him how to take the storm windows out to open the real windows, and he said he had never seen that. Then my parents came home and were glad I was there to let the repair guy in. Then I played some video games before I drove back to Provo. I put on my new shoes and they seemed a little big, so I was debating whether I should try to return them for a smaller size, but I decided not to. (I think they had been clearance anyway.) Then I returned to Provo. This is my journal entry:
"Today I worked at home home, being there for Easter.  The folks are remodeling a lot, and the drywall guy came while I was there. It was a good thing I was home. I finished working, and he was still there, so I played a lot of video games (and finally got to World 8 on Mario 3). Then I eventually left, and tonight I went running."

Roommate reviews

This will be another post where, instead of remembering everything about something, I will remember something about everything.

You can write reviews for pretty much anything these days--businesses, professors, movies, and so on. But what if you could write reviews about roommates you've had? That's what I'm going to do here. I had eighteen roommates during my time at BYU.

However, to avoid awkwardness, I will not write reviews about those with whom I am Facebook friends. Most of them would have positive reviews, but I won't write about any of them.

Roommate #1. I don't think I've ever met someone who hates people more than this person. He wouldn't answer the door. I think he only had one friend, really, not counting roommates 2 and 3.He spent his free time playing World of Warcraft, and I think he might have even skipped church once or twice to do so. He wouldn't talk to me, and I think he talked to my other roommates about me. Now, I was a really awkward roommate at that time, but he was in no way a good roommate for me. One time, I saw him walking down the street, and I said, "Hi, [#1]!" and he didn't even acknowledge me. Not recommended.

#2. Facebook friend.

#3. FB friend.

#4. FB friend.

#5.  FB friend.

#6. I'm not Facebook friends with this person because he doesn't have Facebook. He is a great person and tries to be friends with everyone. He tried to include me in things going on, one of few roommates to do so. Definitely recommended. ("Definitely" seems to be his favorite word!)

#7. FB friend.

#8. FB friend.

#9. I didn't get to know him that well, as he was in another room, was my roommate for only a term, and was frequently gone. He is married now, I believe to the girl he started dating while he was my roommate. Neutral recommendation, but if I knew him better he would probably get a positive recommendation.

#10. FB friend.

#11. Kind of a weird guy. Not a jerk, but not super friendly either. He used to listen to music really loud, and he would listen to the same song on repeat, which could get a little annoying. He moved out halfway through the semester, which was a little odd. Neutral recommendation.

#12. He was friends with #11, and kind of has a similar situation, though he's a bit friendlier. He was not a good home teaching companion. He is married now. Last fall, he was working as a lifeguard at the RB pool, where I would go swimming. I didn't talk to him because I didn't know if I was allowed to. On one occasion, I was getting my kickboard and he was standing right by. I could have talked to him then, but I wouldn't have known what to say, so I didn't say anything. (Maybe I was also embarrassed for him to see me swimming.) If he didn't recognize me, I don't feel that bad. If he did recognize me, then I might feel bad--except that he didn't talk to me either. I still regret, though, that I didn't at least say, "Remember that time we were roommates?" Neutral recommendation.

#13. FB friend.

#14. FB friend.

#15. FB friend.

#16. This is a sweet-bro from South Carolina. He was nice enough, but he had all his SC buddies, so he was always spending time with them or else with his girlfriend, then fiancée (now wife). He didn't make any friends in our ward, despite having an elders quorum presidency calling, which tends to be one in which you need to get to know ward members. While I wasn't Facebook friends with him, I would stalk him, and he was friends with #17 below. My guess is that he sent the friend request to 17--but he never sent one to me, even though he knew me first and he shared my room! I think he was afraid of me. He worked out a lot and had very stinky laundry, which he left on the floor where it was easy to smell. Neutral recommendation, but you wouldn't get a new friend out of him, because he had his SC buddies and had room for no more.

#17. I'm not sure what's up with this quasi-hipster. At first, he was really nice, bringing us leftover waffles from work, watching movies with us, and inviting us to his Christmas party. But then during the second semester, he quit attending our ward. And then he quit talking to us. When we tried to talk to him, it was like we were bothering him. He would go out of town for a long time without telling us. And it wasn't even just that he wouldn't talk to us. He wouldn't respond to important things, like working out paying utilities or responding to apartment management's important emails about renovations. Because of him and other people, I no longer trust people with bow ties, and waffles make me a little uncomfortable. Not recommended.

#18. This guy is one of the South Carolina buddies of #16, but he is even more of a sweet-bro, with less room for new friends, less time at the apartment, more working out, and a diet composed mainly of energy and protein supplements. He spent far more time away from the apartment than he did in it. I'm not sure why he would pay rent just for a storage unit. Neutral recommendation, but you are even less likely to become his friend than you are to become #16's.

Things I learned in college

This week's memory post is a little different. Usually I try to remember everything about something; this time, the structure is more something about everything.

Having graduated from college, I'm going to try to remember something I learned from every class I took. Now, to try to remember everything I learned would be just too much, so I'm just focusing on a few things.


Calculus 1, winter 2010. Math tends to be something I easily forget, and a lot of this was review from high school. But I remember learning that there are practical applications for calculus besides just doing math. For example, if a farmer had limited fencing and wanted to make the largest pen he could out of his materials, he could use calculus to do it. Of course, most farmers haven't taken calculus.

Introduction to Music, winter 2010. I learned about the different periods (Baroque, Classical, Romantic, etc.), and I don't think I had even heard of Haydn before this class. I came to appreciate Handel's Messiah (although the version I ended up buying was not as pretty as the one I heard for class, at least for the "Rejoice greatly" aria).

Book of Mormon 1, winter 2010. I learned about the route some scholars think Lehi followed.

American History through Literature, winter 2010. I read several books I hadn't before: Johnny Tremain, Main Street, Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass, The House of the Seven Gables. I learned about the Plessy v. Ferguson case (separate but equal), since I had to do a report on it.

Introduction to English Language, winter 2010. I learned about descriptivism, having never considered how arbitrary the rules are. I learned IPA, and I learned how interesting linguistics is.

Intermediate French 1, spring 2010. I learned a lot of French vocabulary, since this was the first French class I had had since high school. I learned acheter (to buy), se souvenir (to remember), ananas (pineapple), and soirée familiale (family home evening).

New Testament 1, spring 2010.  There are questions about the origin of the story of the woman taken in adultery. I learned how important Psalm 22 was to the Jews. The woman with the issue of blood, though usually depicted as sitting on the ground, was probably not on the ground or she would have been trampled. Myrrh is a thorny plant.

Intermediate French 2, summer 2010. The Hunchback of Notre Dame is actually more about Paris. I learned about Descarte's "Je pense, donc je suis."

Dinosaurs, summer 2010. Dinosaurs are the ancestors of birds. I learned about the different kinds of dinosaurs: ceratopsians, theropods, sauropods, etc. I learned how fossils are excavated, and most importantly, I learned how cool fossils were. This class led me to eventually be a geology minor.

Internet Publishing, winter 2011. This was not my favorite class, because our instructor was a grad student who wasn't very good, but I did learn some basics of HTML and CSS.

Astronomy, winter 2011. There are different kinds of solar eclipses and lunar eclipses. You can tell time by the moon, although I've forgotten how to do that (but if I thought about it I might be able to do it). Now I can spot Orion, but I've forgotten most of the other constellations. I also learned about this video:

Grammar of English, winter 2011. Our "eight parts of speech" structure is actually based on Latin; if we were to start from scratch, we would probably organize it differently.

Modern American Usage, winter 2011. The class that really converted me from being a prescriptivist to being a descriptivist. A lot of our grammar "rules" come from the 1600s and 1700s, when scholars tried to apply the rules of Latin grammar to English. The rule about prepositions not ending a sentence is based on Latin. The forbidding of split infinitives is similarly based on Latin, but people only talked about it because it was a new phenomenon and therefore they thought it was wrong. Fun was originally a noun, so some people thought you couldn't add -er or -est to it, even though it is definitely used as an adjective. The Oxford English Dictionary and the Corpus of Contemporary/Historical American English are wonderful resources.

Beginning Piano Techniques 1, winter 2011. I learned the importance of practice. I learned about different keys (as in musical keys, not piano keys), but I'd need a refresher.

History of the English Language, spring 2011. I learned about the different events that shaped English--the Roman Empire's holdings in England in the Pre-English phase; the arrival of Saxons that heralded in Old English, and the later Viking invasions; the Norman Invasion that brought about Middle English; the scholars of the Early Modern English. I used this video for a class presentation:

Masterpieces of American Literature, spring 2011. William Bradford said they had turkeys at the first Thanksgiving (take that, know-it-all historians who say they didn't!). We read A Streetcar Named Desire, and I found mention of Charles Anthon (of Joseph Smith--History fame) while doing research on Edgar Allan Poe.

Civilization to 1500, summer 2011. We read Guns, Germs, and Steel, the Dhammapada, The Rise of Christianity, and a book about the Ottoman Empire. I don't think I knew about the Ottoman Empire before this class, and Guns, Germs, and Steel was very enlightening.

Introduction to Archeology, summer 2011. The origin of cultivated corn is a major mystery to archeologists. Archeologists study arrowheads to try to figure out where Native Americans came from.

English Semantics and Pragmatics, winter 2012. I learned about the Gricean maxims, which means that you can say something indirectly but others can still understand your meaning. I learned about the grammatical structures that indicate presupposition; for example, "Where were you when you saw him?" presupposes that you saw him.

Beginning Piano Techniques 2, winter 2012. I learned how to play "Did You Think to Pray?" with both hands, but I'm out of practice now.

Basic Editing Skills, winter 2012. I learned all the editing guidelines I use for work, thanks to the Chicago Manual of Style. I learned that you use a comma between two independent clauses joined by the FANBOYS conjunctions, but you generally don't use a comma if the subject is not repeated. Thus: "I went to the store, and I went to the beach," but "I went to the store and went to the beach." I don't always care about this rule, though, because I don't think it's overly helpful. I learned to use en dashes in number ranges.

Doctrine and Covenants 1, winter 2012. Martin Harris's wife wasn't happy with his involvement with the Book of Mormon (and understandably so). Some early Saints had some crazy experiences, like one creeping on the ground, saying he was going to preach to the Lamanites, and another one jumping off a cliff but landing in a tree.

Physical Geology, winter 2012. I thought that only historical geology would be interesting, but this class taught me to love the physical aspect, perhaps even more than the historical. Most of the things I know about geology I learned in this class, although they were refined later. I learned about igneous (gabbro, diorite, granite, tuff, rhyolite, andesite, basalt, pumice, obsidian), sedimentary (chalk, rock salt, rock gypsum, sandstone, limestone, dolostone, shale, conglomerate), and metamorphic (gneiss, slate, phyllite, schist, quartzite, marble) rocks. I learned about subduction zones, silicic and basaltic volcanoes, glacial features, and climate change. This was one of the most influential classes of my college career.

Print Publishing, spring 2012. I learned a little about Adobe Illustrator and InDesign. I'm proud of the dinosaur vector I made in Illustrator. I learned a little about design principles, including typography, colors, and alignment.

Civilization from 1500, spring 2012. This was my least favorite of all my classes, but I learned about the beginning of World War I and how that war led to the Great Depression and WWII. I don't think I'd ever heard of Mao Zedong before this class, nor had I heard of fascism (shocking, right?).

Advanced French Grammar, summer 2012. I learned the difference in pronunciation between "u" and "ou." Different French verbs use different prepositions, but you just have to memorize them.

Writings of Isaiah, summer 2012. Snow in ancient Israel was seen as a purifying agent. Isaiah is hard to understand, but understanding the context helps.

Book of Mormon 2, summer 2012. The Book of Mormon does have parallels for our day. Alma's confrontation with Korihor may have been a Church disciplinary council. Some BYU professors actually believe dinosaurs lived recently.

Empirical Methods in English Linguistics, fall 2012. Although linguistics isn't a science, it follows empirical methods for observation and experimentation. There are computer programs that can analyze stylistic structures.

Varieties of English, fall 2012. Most of Canada speaks the same dialect. I'm not good at detecting dialects, but now I am more aware of differences, even if I can't always place an accent. Men and women can speak quite differently.

Substantive Editing (Scholarly Publishing), fall 2012. Headings can really help a paper's organization. Other cultures have different expectations of what goes into a paper; in eastern cultures, the papers often aren't revised, and they just have a stream-of-consciousness approach. The passive construction can aid in clarity.

Environmental Biology, fall 2012. The coiled fluorescent bulbs may do more damage than good. Glass isn't recycled in Utah, so it has to be transported; thus it might do more harm to recycle glass in Utah. Utah uses coal power, so electric cars in Utah aren't that environmentally friendly.

Geomorphology, fall 2012. Death Valley is awesome. Meandering streams form from slow-moving water, while braided streams come from varying amounts of water with lots of sediments.

Jogging, fall 2012.  I learned some stretches and warmups, but I don't use them like I should. We need more carbs than we need protein.

Historical geology, winter 2013. Tufa is a kind of sharp limestone formed from springs. There are different mountain-building events called orogenies, although I didn't understand them as well as I should have. Single-celled organisms were around for billions of years before they became multi-celled. The Devonian Period was the age of fish.

Old Testament 1, winter 2013.  The oath-making "put your hand on my thigh" is euphemistic. Jonathan was a good friend to David.

Geology of planets, winter 2013. Jupiter's moon Io has volcanoes. Saturn's moon Titan is a lot like earth, with lakes of liquid methane. Mars used to have rivers of water, and it has ice just under its surface. (Some of this stuff I learned in geomorphology, because I had the same professor.)

Phonetics and phonology, winter 2013. There is one Native American language with only three speakers, and they don't talk to each other. You can observe speech and make diagrams to analyze under what circumstances a certain phoneme occurs.

Early Modern English, winter 2013. Shakespeare was an amazingly talented writer, because they were taught rigorously back then. When we read old texts, the biggest problem is not in the words we don't recognize, it's in the words that we think we know but that have actually changed meaning.

Editing for publication, spring 2013. Fractions use a hyphen (as in "three-fourths"). I tend to trust authors too much. It never occurred to me that you can download vectors from the internet; I thought you had to make your own.

Structure of English, spring 2013. Knowing the structure of English can help you create jokes and clever slogans. Because of this class, I notice ambiguity and garden-path (misleading) sentences everywhere.

Field studies, fall (pre-fall) 2013. Tufa doesn't necessarily form around plants. Around 600 million years ago, the supercontinent Rodinia broke up, making Utah a beach. One of the cracks allowed the Uinta Mountains to form, which is why they run east to west instead of north to south. Before it broke up, the world was an icehouse earth, and glaciers formed the Mineral Fork Tillite. After the breakup, the beach environment formed the Tintic Quartzite, Ophir Shale, and Maxfield Limestone. During the Jurassic, Utah was covered with sand dunes, creating the Navajo Sandstone. Capitol Reef has seventeen geologic formations, while Zion National Park only has three.

Groundwater, fall 2013. Groundwater takes hundreds to thousands of years to replenish. By knowing the kind of rock, the pressure, and the amount of water, hydrogeologists can calculate how fast groundwater flows. Geologists can determine the pressure by drilling wells. I didn't learn as much in groundwater as I would have liked to.

Swimming for Non-Swimmers, fall 2013. I learned how to do the freestyle, breastroke, and backstroke. But I can't do the butterfly, even though I know what it looks like.

The Senior Course (corpus linguistics), fall 2013. I learned how to use Mark Davies's corpora, from Mark Davies himself. I use them all the time in editing. From some of my projects, I learned that discussions of chastity have decreased in general conference talks since the 1980s, except for discussions of pornography. Uses of the term "dinosaur" and "fossil" increased dramatically in the 1990s, probably because of Jurassic Park.

Old English 1, fall 2013. Old English had a lot more inflections than today's English. "Neorxnawange" is a word for "paradise" that has no known etymology. "Wyrm" could mean worm, snake, dragon, or pus.

Technical Communications, fall 2013. Some college students are surprisingly bad writers. From my own project, I learned that Chrome is slightly the best browser, but not enough for me to quit using Firefox. When you create instructions, you should split the steps up so that there's not more than seven steps per section.

Beginning Weight Training, winter 2014. When doing squats, your knees should not go in. Weight machines work out fewer muscles than free weights do.

Advanced French Part 2, winter 2014. Words ending in "ait" or "ais" make a different vowel than those ending in "ai." I learned a fair amount of vocabulary, including "carotte de glace," meaning ice core, or literally "carrot of ice."

The Publishing Industry, winter 2014. Agents help authors get their books published. The requirements for publishers vary. Don't try to sell your book to Covenant, because they try to take away all your rights. The nonfiction world is easier to get into than the fiction world (which works well for me).

Geology Seminar, winter 2014. The Yellowstone magma chamber may actually be cooling down. Our ideas about the formation of mudstones under water might not be quite true.

Academic Internship, fall 2013, winter 2014. My internships provided me with valuable experience. I learned that if often pays to do a little research on the topic you are editing.

Editing student journals, winter 2012, winter 2014. A lot of aspiring editors aren't very good and/or are overzealous. Copyfitting isn't too difficult.

I hope that I will keep learning, even though I'm out of college.