Leprechaun stories

When I was a little kid, I believed that all holidays are created equal, and subsequently I didn't realize that St. Patrick's Day is the most pointless of all popular holidays. Come March, my mind was turned to leprechauns, and I would invent stories.

In kindergarten, I decided to create a play that I would perform for my family. My mom had bought me a plastic leprechaun hat (and my aunt rescued it from blowing away outside the store on a windy day), so I would don it for my plays. My friend Hillary Ulmer had a gold-colored shiny cheerleader pom-pom, and I asked her if I could have it. I put it in a glass jar and that was my pot of gold, the stringy gold parts hanging over the jar. (I actually can't remember if I had that in time for the leprechaun plays, but I know I used that as a decoration for years. Sometimes I put the plastic hat on top of it, and one time our home teacher asked if it was Cousin Itt!)

Anyway, one day after school, I was planning on my leprechaun play, and my brother David, who was thirteen, wanted to help me out, and he wore the hat he got for Christmas. We went around improvising this play, but after a while it was too violent (with shooting) and un-leprechauny that I didn't want his help anymore. In the evening I gathered my family around while I performed my leprechaun play in front of our fireplace. It was kind of a day in the life of a leprechaun, and I would narrate things like "Now I'm asleep. Now I'm eating breakfast." And so on. When I was "sleeping," I would use a yellow crocheted blanket we had. I think I performed the play several times, and I tried to make sure I was wearing green every time, but soon I realized that if I did that, I wouldn't have any green to wear for St. Patrick's Day.

In first grade, we got some leprechaun window clings that really piqued my interest, and I even made a song based on them. One day in class, I raised my hand and mentioned that I had a song about leprechauns, so I sang my hokey little song. I think I mostly made it up as I went along, but I know the first line was, "I'm a little leprechaun a-sitting on a clover." I think I meant "toadstool," but for some reason it came out clover.

We also needed to write a leprechaun story for class. My copy of this story might be floating around the house somewhere. The only thing I remember is that it started out with a leprechaun going around collecting "horseshoes and brimstones." And by "brimstones" I meant "Blarney stones," not realizing there's only one Blarney Stone.

In second grade we were instructed to write a leprechaun story. Fortunately, I know where that is, so here is my transcription (there are some capitalization marks in it, but I don't know whether they were put there by me or someone else. I'm going to incorporate those edits):

My Leprechaun
One day I went outside to get the mail. When I looked down, there was a leprechaun on our door step. His back Was to my feet. I Caught it by the stomach. "Let Me go! Let me go! Me have to go to Ireland in 10 years! let me go! Let me go!"
I brought the leprechaun in. "I'm hungry," said the leprechaun. "So let me go and get food! let me go!"
"Wait a minute," I said. I will get you some food." I made him some Soup. He duck his head in the soup. His hat plopped up. 
"Ow," complained the leprechaun. "Me face Is burning!"
"You were'nt supposed to do that," I said. "You were supposed to do that when It cooled. And stop saying me instead of My. It's not proper english."
"But it is proper Irish," said the leprechaun. "Where's your pot of gold? Give me your pot of gold! And stay with me when you give it to me!"
"Okay," said the leprechaun. He didn't eat his soup, he Just went outside. Then there was a knock at the door. I opened it. There Was the leprechaun.
"Hi," he said. "Here's a pot of gold and a pot of silver. Bye." And as quick as a wink, he ran off. "That foolish leprechaun," I said "He's mean too, but I do have gold and silver." The end.

(I must say that I'm impressed that at eight years old, my only misspelling was the placement of the apostrophe in "weren't.")

Then in fourth grade, I didn't really have a story per se, but I took on a leprechaun persona. I was tired of Easter stuff before St. Patrick's Day, so as a leprechaun I said I hated Easter. On St. Patrick's Day, my friend Cody Zesiger and I played some game where I think he was trying to catch me. Before he went home, I gave him some mashed up shiny pipecleaners--gold, silver, and blue and silver (which I said was a mushed-up mushroom).