One of my most shameful moments

The problem with having a good memory (as everyone tells me I have) is that sometimes I remember things that I don't want to remember.

And when I think about my life, the time when I did the stupidest, worst things when I was in ninth grade. A decade later, I'm glad I'm not that age anymore.

There is one event that when I think about it now, I am filled with so much guilt and embarrassment that I want to close my eyes in shame (which means I can't think about it when I'm driving).

It was towards the end of the school year in 2004. In my Earth Systems class, we were working in the computer lab. It was school policy that you weren't allowed to play games online, and if you did, you could lose your computer access. Well, the girl sitting next to me was playing games.

Call me what you will--a tattle-tale, a nark, a squealer--I went and told the teacher, "Jennifer Bakker* is playing computer games," and then I went and sat in my seat.

[*Names have been changed.]

The teacher then said out loud, "Jennifer Bakker, shut down your computer." The girl next to me said, "Do you think she knows?" and closed out of her computer game.

Then I noticed the computer lady walking with a girl down to the office.

And soon thereafter, the teacher came up to me and said, "Did you mean the girl sitting by you?"

You see, there was a girl named Jennifer Bakker in my class. But it wasn't the girl next to me playing video games. Her name was Janelle Evans*. I had condemned an innocent girl.

The teacher said to me that she did notice that the girl next to me had closed out of her game. I don't remember exactly what she said, but it sounded like when I told her Jennifer Bakker, she thought I was talking about Janelle Evans.

I think it got sorted out that Jennifer hadn't done anything wrong. But I felt so terrible and dumb.

I suppose it wasn't any of my business what Janelle was doing on her computer. It wasn't my place to tattle. Maybe it would have been if she were looking at porn or learning how to build a bomb, but not for just playing games. But even if I was justified in telling on her, I definitely should not have done so without knowing her name.

Last summer, I told this story to some classmates in my French class. One of them said to me, "We would have shoved you in a locker for that."

And that would have been fitting. (Except that I was too big to fit in the lockers.)